fasterfood:

"God damn it!" i yell as i stub my toe on a table. suddenly from the sky, i hear god reply "okay". the floor splits open, revealing a pit to hell. god pushes the table down into the pit, and then it seals up. he actually did it. god damned it.

(via zackisontumblr)

beyonseh:

I’M FUCKINFDGJNFJLKDNGS

(via penis-hilton)

original-plastic:

Homosexuality is unnatural! It says so in this book where snakes talk, people come back from the dead, a guy walks on water, and a virgin has a baby.

(via swarnpert)

arnbrosia:

quickweaves:

THIS IS THE MOST POWERFUL VINE 

send this to all the straight boys in your life

(Source: weloveshortvideos.com, via ziambuttsex)

  • author:

    she didn't want to eat dinner because she doesn't like chicken noodle soup

  • english teacher:

    even though it doesn't say it, we can infer that 17 years ago she encountered an attack from chickens while on a trip to africa visiting her great aunt who was dying from pneumonia which she got from chickens that were being harvested for the great feast

  • tumblr:

    lol fukin stupid teacher

  • loki:

    blinks

  • tumblr:

    do you see this? do you see that blink? that fucking blink. it shows how much pain he has inside of him. look at him. all he wants is his father to love him. look at the tears that he is holding back. he's never been the favorite son, he always knew that he didn't belong. this is the fucking blink that makes me love loki. he's not a villain. he's just a scared, lonely child.

resurgance:

the government be like

image

(via spankmehardbarry)

yoncevevo:

fuckyeahblackcelebrities:

nicki watching iggy perform

*kill bill sirens*

yoncevevo:

fuckyeahblackcelebrities:

nicki watching iggy perform

*kill bill sirens*

(via penis-hilton)

gorilllas:

@myself what the fuck are you doing

(via anustartpop)


scrollin all this good good

scrollin all this good good

(Source: infallibleworld, via gay4zayn)

(Source: cyberpapi, via ziambuttsex)

whitedad:

*12 year old going through a breakup* i just cant do it anymore

(via gay4zayn)

aaropostle:

Remember when Katy Perry found a loaded gun in Rihanna’s purse during the VMA’s.

image

(Source: , via jesuschristvevo)

penis-hilton:

versaceslut:

versaceslut:

letting everyone in my class know I’m a bottom

image

did my teacher just shade gaga?

you need to drag your teacher

mrs. edgar allen poe